【英语生活】如何对付傲慢的MBA

An MBA graduate from London Business School recently joined my team. To the annoyance of all other team members, he is living up to the MBA acronym, Mighty Big Attitude. He assumes he is on a fast track to senior management, name-drops his MBA theories, and is reluctant to do tasks he considers beneath him. How should I approach him about his manner in the work environment? I have no doubt he is a skilled worker but his cocksure demeanour and lack of team awareness must surely be addressed?

Manager, male, 51

LUCY'S ANSWER

There are few sights quite as ugly to someone with your length of experience
as a jargon-talking young whippersnapper who thinks he is destined for the top.

Alas, one of the reasons the sight is so horrible is that the whippersnapper is likely to be right – I fear this one may advance far faster and further than you ever have. He talks the language, he has the ambition and people like him have a sickening way of doing really well.

I am assuming that you didn't hire him yourself? If you did you are very silly: obnoxiousness is one of the few things that show up clearly at interview. It sounds as if you had him thrust upon you by someone senior, who saw promise, rather than a cocksure idiot jabbering about strategic initiatives.

In this case there is no point in wasting your time trying to coach him. He isn't going to listen to you, as you are on the wrong side of the culture gap. You think he is pushy; I bet he thinks you are a has-been and a failure.

As his line manager it is simply your job to ensure that he does what he is supposed to do, whether he thinks it beneath him or not. If he refuses you have every right to come down on him very hard.

Either way I don't think this situation will last long. Probably he will get promoted on to someone else's team and you won't have to think about him any more.

If he doesn't, there is a good chance he'll quit. It is encouraging that everyone else on your team dislikes him. Unless he is really thick-skinned, he may find that being ostracised in a job that he thinks is below him is not a compelling value proposition.

With any luck he will take his awful jargon to a management consultancy, where both his words and his attitude would fit in nicely.

YOUR ADVICE

Break him

We get this all the time. To quote Oliver Cromwell, “I tell you, sir, there is no other way to deal with these men but to break them in pieces.” Set him useless tasks that keep him in the office until 3am night after night and all weekend while his colleagues work on more productive and less time-consuming projects. Within a month he will be physically and mentally broken and you can do with him what you will.

Banker, male, 37

Get stuck in

Tell the scumbag that MBA stands for Means Bugger All without experience, soul and humility. Suggest that they get down and do the dirty work before they ask for a rise.

MBA tutor, male, 49

Acid test

Assign him a task reflecting the size of his ego. This is a win for you either way: if he succeeds then his sense of self-worth was right all along and you have a prodigy; otherwise, you will have cut him down to size without blood on your hands.

Banker, male, 39

Bully boy

I am an MBA and was bullied by people like you who lacked intellect but held high positions. Eventually I was fired, which was fine by me as I went on to find a job where I was more appreciated.

MBA, male, 30s

Quiet word

We will self-police this. If we can get a hint as to who it is, we will talk to him offline. This is not the kind of behaviour that is reflective of LBS graduates.

Posted by ‘LBS Class of 2007' graduate

Manhunt

That last comment is a bit sinister. If attending LBS means you are sentenced to a lifetime of scrutiny by some self-appointed cabal of enforcers, I think I'll do my MBA elsewhere.

Male, anon

伦敦商学院(London Business School)的一位MBA毕业生最近加入了我的团队。让其它所有同事都很烦恼的是，他在身体力行地告诉我们什么是MBA——非常傲慢的态度(Mighty Big Attitude)。他自认为踏上了走向高级管理层的快行线，向同事们炫耀着自己的MBA理论，不愿做那些自认有失身份的工作。我该如何和他探讨他在工作环境中的行为举止？我毫不怀疑，他很有能力，但他独断专行和缺乏团队意识的问题必须得到解决，不是吗？经理，男，51岁



露西的回答

对于拥有你这种经验相当的人，几乎没有什么场面比一位满嘴行话、自以为是、认为自己注定将升入高层的年轻人更丑陋的了。

唉！这种场面如此可怕的原因之一是，这个自以为是的年轻人可能是对的——恐怕这个人的升迁速度会比你更快，比你升得更高。他专业、有理想，像他这样的人可以以令人讨厌的方式把事情做得非常好。



我猜不是你亲自聘用的他吧？如果是，那你就非常愚蠢：在面试时能够清楚体现出来的东西并不多，而反感正是其中之一。这好像是你的上司硬把他塞给你的，你上司看到的是发展前途，而非一个闲聊战略举措的独断的傻瓜。



在这种情况下，浪费时间对他进行培训毫无意义。他不会听你的，因为你站在了文化鸿沟错误的一方。你认为他胆大妄为；但我打赌，他会认为你已经成为过去时，是个失败者。

作为他的部门经理，你的工作就是确保他做了他应该做的事，不管他是否认为有失身份。如果他拒绝，你完全有权非常严厉地惩罚他。

无论如何，我认为这种情况不会持续很长时间。他可能会升迁，进入其它团队，到那时你就不需要再考虑他了。

如果他没有升迁，那他很有可能辞职。有利的是，你团队中的每个人都不喜欢他。除非他脸皮真的很厚，否则他可能就会发现，在他认为有失身份的工作中遭到排挤不是一个令人信服的价值主张(value proposition)。



如果幸运的话，他将把那些可怕的行话带到管理咨询公司，他的措辞和态度会非常契合这份工作。



读者建议

打击他

我们总会碰到这种事。引用奥利弗•克伦威尔(Oliver Cromwell)的话说：“我告诉你，先生，对付这些人没有其它办法，只有将其打成碎片。”给他做没有意义的工作，让他每天以及所有的周末都在办公室呆到凌晨3点，同时把更有建设性、不太费时的项目分配给其他同事。不到一个月，他就会身心俱疲，然后你就可以任意处置他了。

银行家，男，37岁

让他卖力工作

告诉这个卑鄙的家伙，MBA代表没有经验、灵魂、不懂得谦逊、一无是处的混蛋(Means Bugger All)。告诉他们，他们应该坐下来做脏活，然后才能要求升迁。

MBA导师，男，49岁

给他一次严峻考验

分配给他一项能反映他自负程度的任务。不论结果如何，你都是胜利者：如果他成功完成任务，那么他的自负就是正确的，你拥有了一个天才；如果不成功，你就可以兵不血刃的让他拥有自知之明。

银行家，男，39岁

这是欺负人

我是一位MBA，也曾被那些像你一样缺乏知识却身居高职的人欺负过。最终，我被炒了鱿鱼，这对我来说是件好事，因为我找到了一份自己更受赏识的工作。

MBA，男，30多岁

安静处理

我们会自己处理此事。如果我们能得到关于此人是谁的暗示，我们会在线下和他谈谈。这不是伦敦商学院毕业生应有的行为。

伦敦商学院2007级毕业生发帖

搜捕

最后一个评论有些险恶。如果进入伦敦商学院意味着，你注定将终生受到一些自封的执法人的审查，我想我会在其它学校读MBA。

男，佚名

译者/梁艳裳