平台严格禁止发布违法/不实/欺诈等垃圾信息，一经发现将永久封禁帐号，针对违法信息将保留相关证据配合公安机关调查！
2010-5-30 09:44
THE PROBLEMThe most dreaded event in my social year is the office Christmas party. I loathe the fake camaraderie, excessive alcohol consumption and hideous vulgarity. Far from making me bond with my colleagues, it makes me dislike my boss and feel alienated by the drunken behaviour of my underlings. Last year I vowed: never again. But the recession has now put all our jobs at risk (and has also cut the party budget, which means this year's plonk will be filthier than ever). My question is this: if one is interested in holding on to a job, does one have to turn up?
Senior manager, male, 42 LUCY'S ANSWER You ask if turning up to the Christmas party helps one hold on to a job. No, of course it doesn't. Even in the most paranoid times at the most dysfunctional company no one decides who to keep and who to dump on that basis. The main risk posed to one's career by the Christmas party is not from failing to show up. It is from showing up and then throwing up – or worse. Yet in spite of this, I still think you should decide to go along, but only if you can adopt a new attitude first. When I was 48 I used to feel just like you do about Christmas parties. I thought that the office was for working, and that alcohol was for drinking when not working. Put the two together and the mixture is horrible: stilted, embarrassing and potentially calamitous. However, something odd happened to me at last year's party to make me change my mind. I talked to a senior manager whom I had previously viewed as impressive yet impersonal, indeed as bordering on sub-human. Yet at the party he was animated, friendly and even quite funny. On subsequent meetings he has reverted to his chilly ways, but as I remember his behaviour at the party I'm inclined to forgive him. There is a certain sort of person – and I wonder if you are one of them – that is born two drinks short. Only with a couple of glasses of vile plonk inside them do they warm up to normal levels. To let both your bosses and your underlings see your soft underbelly (assuming you have one) will not necessarily mean that you keep your job. But it might make all the hardness that is to come a little less unpleasant. If I have it wrong, and you are beastly even when slightly drunk, then stay home. You won't be missed. YOUR ADVICE Go Christmas parties are one of the few social obligations left in life. The trick is doing it with dignity. Make sure you arrive just a little late, smile and chatter happily, and make one glass of bad wine last a long time. Then have an excuse to leave early – that's what a family is for. Manager, male, 34 Don't go If you really feel you can't spend time with your colleagues outside work, then you shouldn't go. I never attend work Christmas parties, as I don't like to see people that I work with when they are drunk. Anon, male Go You are taking this far too seriously. Go, put on a smile, work the room, and once your colleagues start to get pissed you may even find some enjoyment in it. My boss's wife vomiting over his shoes was an unexpected highlight of one year's Christmas event . . . Consultant, female, 49 Don't go Don't go if you don't want to. Why should people have to go to an after-hours party? Everything about it screams “voluntary” to me. If the company can't figure out how to make it enjoyable, to hell with it! Teacher, female, 54 Go If you do not understand why you have to go, then you should submit your resignation now. There are people on the dole with less desperation than bleeds through your letter. IT manager, male, 53 Cancelled Think yourself lucky you still have a Christmas party. For most of us they are a dim and distant memory. Anon, male 问题在一年的社交活动中，我最害怕的就是办公室圣诞晚会。我讨厌虚情假意、过度饮酒和言行粗鄙。它没有把我和同事们凝聚在一起，而是让我讨厌自己的老板，在下属的醉酒行为中感到孤立无援。去年，我发誓再也不参加了。但经济衰退现在让我们所有人的饭碗都变得不稳（我们的晚会预算也减少了，这意味着今年的酒将比往年更差劲）。我的问题是：如果某人想保住饭碗，是不是就必须去参加圣诞晚会？
高级经理，男，42岁 露西的答案 你问参加圣诞晚会是否会帮助某人保住饭碗。不，当然不会。即便在最混乱的公司，在最偏执的时刻，也没有人会根据这一点决定员工的去留。 圣诞晚会给职业生涯带来的主要风险不是来自于不参加晚会，而是来自于参加晚会然后喝到呕吐——或者更糟。 尽管如此，我仍然认为你应该参加，但前提是你要采取一种新的态度。 在我48岁时，我对圣诞晚会的看法跟你一模一样。我认为，办公室是用来工作的，酒是在不工作的时候喝的。把这两件东西放在一起，后果很可怕：虚伪、尴尬，还可能会带来祸患。 不过，去年晚会上遇到的一件怪事改变了我的想法。当时我与一位高级经理聊天。以前，我一直认为他是个不平常的人，但个性冷淡，实际上他几乎不像个人。然而，在那次晚会上，他表现得活泼、友善甚至非常风趣。在后来的会议上，他又变回到那冷酷的作风，但因为我还记得他在晚会上的行为，因此我决定原谅他。 有一种人——我不知道你是不是属于这一类人——生来就欠灌。只有给他们灌上几杯马尿，他们才能兴奋起来，变成正常人的样子。 让你的老板和下属看到你那松松垮垮的肚子（假设你有），并不一定意味着你会保住饭碗。但它可能会让所有的那些艰辛变得不那么令人难受。 如果我说错了，你是那种喝点酒就会发酒疯的人，那就呆在家里吧。没有人会想念你。 您的建议 去 圣诞晚会是生活中为数不多的社交义务之一。关键是要表现出你的体面。你要保证让自己略晚到一小会儿，席间要保持微笑，愉快地与人闲聊，手中那杯劣质酒要喝上很长时间。然后找个借口提前离开——家人这时候就派上用场了。 经理，男，34岁 不去 如果你真的感到在工作时间之外不能和同事们呆在一起，那就不应该去。我从未参加过公司举办的圣诞晚会，因为我不想看到与我共事的人喝醉的样子。 匿名，男 去 你把这件事看的太重了。去吧，带上微笑，随便转悠一下，等同事们开始喝醉了，说不定你还会从中找到一些乐趣。我老板的太太把一肚子东西吐在他的鞋子上，这成了那年圣诞晚会上意外的重头戏…… 咨询顾问，女，49岁 不去 如果不想去就别去。人们为什么非得参加工作之余的聚会？对我来说，那一切都在尖叫着“自愿”。如果公司不能让它变得有趣，就让它见鬼去吧。 教师，女，54岁 去 如果你不知道自己为什么必须参加的话，那么现在就应递交你的辞职信。一些领取失业救济金的人还没有你信中这么痛苦绝望。 IT经理，男，53岁 我们的晚会取消了 想想你还有圣诞晚会，这是多么幸运啊。对于我们多数人而言，圣诞晚会已经是一个模糊而遥远的记忆。 匿名，男 译者/梁艳裳 |